The Purity Within Grief

Feb 19, 2021

I don’t do grief perfectly. Who does?

Grief is exhausting.

Yet I know it’s an expression of life that needs to be expressed because if I resist grief, I resist love.

When experiencing a loss, it can be one of the most sacred times in life. Your heart and soul experience such devastation that can rock your foundation.

Taking the time for self-care is more important than ever. Some of the most devastating times in my life were also some of the purest. My heart would feel so raw.

Even though I may have felt broken, I connected to something pure beneath the surface. Loss can be a pure part of life because it teaches us what’s important. It’s a time that allows our hearts to speak and share.

I’m always seeking guidance on ways to help during deep disconnection. I wanted to explore how to find purity in times of deep struggle and ways to help others during those times.

Again, I don’t do this perfectly in grief. But I write them below to remind myself of self-care.

Here are suggestions to bring purity to the mind, body, and spirit in grief.

1) Befriend Uncomfortable Feelings – Let all your feelings flow and embrace the ones you want to avoid, like sadness or anger. It’s okay to take time to grieve. Cry. Tears help purify our emotions. Tears allow grief to flow. It’s okay to be angry. Release a primal scream. By expressing them authentically, it purifies your emotions for peace and provides you happiness to breathe. Relax. And let all your feelings flow today.

2) Nurture Your Mind – Develop awareness of what you’re putting into your mind. Be careful with watching too much TV, social media, or the news. When in grief, it’s important to take in things that nurture you, not scare you. In your sadness, love yourself. Meditation helps purify the mind. By observing the breath, it quiets the craziness of mind. Release any fearful ideas from your mind and just breathe.

3) Move Your Body – Take care of your body with exercise. Work out to something that inspires you. Yoga is a moving meditation to help purify your body. The flowing, stretching nature helps bring balance and flow. Go to the gym or find time to dance allowing your body and heart to flow. Find a way to move your body that helps you to sweat. Discover new strengths about yourself even in the depths of loss. Tune into your resilience.

4) Eat Nourishing Food – It’s normal for eating habits to change in grief. You can binge eat to drown out the feelings or choose to not eat at all. Take care of your body by eating healthy foods that nourish you. Drinking water and eating healthy vegetables, salads, fruits, and almonds can help support and replenish your body.

5) Take Time in Nature – Take a walk outside and feel the wind on your skin. Look up into the sky and see the clouds or stars. Feel the earth support you and observe how the seasons change. Even in the cold dark winter, spring can blossom a new life. After a devastating storm, a rainbow can appear.

6) Embrace Laughter – Laughter brings emotional balance to your life. Reach out to a friend that makes you laugh. Watch a movie or TV show that makes you smile. Laughter helps with your breathing and releases endorphins from your brain. The body can’t tell if the laughter is real or fake. Sometimes it’s okay to fake it until you make it and embrace laughter as a pain medication to help. It’s okay to take time off from grieving and move into laughter. Happiness is your birthright. Explore ways to help hold space for joy.

7) Connect to Spirit – You are a spiritual being having a human experience. Develop that connection to a power greater than yourself through prayer or random acts of kindness. Perhaps you can offer a loving gesture to someone without expecting anything back in return. Or finding forgiveness toward yourself or others while connecting to the innocence of what is. If you’re grieving someone who has died, speak to them and share your feelings with them. Believe that spiritually, they are still a part of you.

The important thing – be gentle and loving to yourself today.

It starts there.


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